Archive | September, 2012

Talk to the hand!

24 Sep

My daughter was talking nonsense to my son.
My son tells my daughter, “talk to the hand” and stretches his hand to her face.
My daughter immediately responds, “Hello! hand!”
“Be quiet, stupid!”
“Hello, hand!”
“Aahhh stop it!”
“Hello, hand!”

One of the moments that I want to remember.  Kids are so innocent and funny!

ūüôā

OCD? Maybe…yes, just a little. Part 2

24 Sep

I stress myself out easily. ¬†I realize that. ¬†It’s just me, that’s who I am…or is this just an excuse? ¬†“Don’t sweat the small stuff”¬† I do tell myself afterwards, when I realize that I may be creating an issue out of something unimportant.

Daily stuff that I stress over are: keeping the house tidy, getting my son to school on time, homework (I TOTALLY stress out ), getting the kids ready for bed, etc. ¬†I can not go to bed with dirty dishes in my sink. ¬†I do laundry every other day. ¬†I’m a “responsibility” before “pleasure” kind of a person, so that automatically puts me into “easily-stressed” category. ¬†I’m always thinking about the consequences of my actions, and always planning the days ahead, that when I can’t get the things I need to get done, (as I calculated in my head,) is when my stress level goes up. ¬†When my son drags on the homework, I totally freak out, because I know I need to cook, feed, brush teeth, bathe, and sleep by 9. ¬†I still need to clean the kitchen and get myself ready for bed, preferably by midnight. ¬†I’m always racing with time. ¬†“Time is irrelevant”…¬† I wish we live in a utopia where time IS irrelevant – but we don’t.

When I step back and see these things in a bigger scale, it is pathetic that I constantly stress over these routines that are just tasks. ¬†I really do not want to waste a great part of my life being stressed, upset, angry…I can simplify, and be happy! ¬†I feel very guilty at the end of the night, when I see my innocent kids sleeping (like angels,) that I was screaming at them, for making a mess… ¬†My mom told me that it’s their job to make a mess at their age – it’s what they do. ¬†I realize that it’s not fair that I expect my kids to always say “yes, mama” and do what I ask them to do, listen, and pick up their mess, and eat their greens…

My hubby is quite opposite in terms of these daily tasks, and reminds me what is really important in life, that I can go to bed if I’m tired, and leave the dishes til the morning (he is willing to do the dishes for me, but my OCD¬†paranoia does not trust anyone else’s cleaning skills) ¬†He forwarded me this link to read the other day, and it really made me rethink about my ways, and that the big picture is what really counts.

Here’s how it goes:

A philosophy professor stood before his class with some items on the table in 
front of him. When the class began, wordlessly he picked up a very large and 
empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with rocks about 2″ in diameter.

He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.

So the professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the 
jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles, of course, rolled into the open 
areas between the rocks.

He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.

The professor picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, 
the sand filled up everything else.

He then asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a 
unanimous “Yes.”

The professor then produced two cans of beer from under the table and 
proceeded to pour their entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the
empty 
space between the sand. The students laughed.

“Now,” said the professor, as the laughter subsided, “I want you to recognize¬†
that this jar represents your life. The rocks are the important things –¬†
your family, your partner, your health, your children Рthings that if
everything 
else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full. The 
pebbles are the other things that matter Рlike your job, your house, your car. 
The sand is everything else. The small stuff.”

“If you put the sand into the jar first,” he continued, “there is no room for¬†
the pebbles or the rocks. The same goes for your life. If you spend all 
your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things 
that are important to you. Pay attention to the things that are critical to 
your happiness. Play with your children. Take time to get medical checkups. 
Take your partner out dancing. There will always be time to go to work, clean 
the house, give a dinner party and fix the disposal. Take care of the rocks 
first Рthe things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just 
sand.”

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the beer represented.

The professor smiled. “I’m glad you asked. It just goes to¬†show¬†you that no¬†
matter how full your life may seem, there’s always room for a couple of¬†
beers.”

So what if there’s a mess in the kids room over night? ¬†So what if I pile up dirty laundry for a week? ¬†So what if I forgot to pick up eggs today? ¬†I can do it tomorrow. ¬†(oh no! ¬†now I need to rearrange my schedule for tomorrow!!!) Ugh… Relax!

OCD? Maybe…Yes, just a little. Part 1

24 Sep

Lately, my frustration level and frequency has been higher than ever before. ¬†Why? ¬†I know why. ¬†It is the loss of control that I face day after day. ¬†Although I’ve mellowed down a bit, (or maybe I’ve given up) keeping up with my OCD tendancies has been challenging (to say the least) when living with 2 toddlers.

I have to have my house in a certain way, certain order. ¬†Every single item in my house has it’s place, and it should always be there, not anywhere else. ¬†Clothes in my drawers has to be folded in a certain way. ¬†Pants hanging should have the straight end facing out, so it leaves a clean look. ¬†My kids’ toys are organized in plastic bags, and in it’s designated boxes. ¬†Everything must be contained in it’s own space within a drawer (I love the Container Store.) ¬†Dishes must be hand washed, I am the few people on this earth that doesn’t believe a dishwasher can really clean my dishes. ¬†Utensils and glasses must be hand wiped dry, because I can not stand water spots on them. ¬†Everything has to be in a certain way. ¬†I really got obsessed with¬†vacuuming during my second pregnancy. ¬†I was paranoid about keeping a clean floor, (I shed alot, and I had a chihuahua that shed ALOT as well), and I was chasing my dog around with the¬†vacuum throughout the day…yes, it was excessive. ¬†I don’t trust anyone else’s cleaning skills, so I have to do ALL cleaning myself. ¬†I have a list of little details that goes on and on.

These tasks used to be alot easier to keep up with…before. ¬†Now, I feel like I have three people (that would be my husband and 2 young kids) living with me that are constantly compromising my efforts! ¬†When I do my cleaning, I expect to have my bathrooms clean for a week, at least, but I’m lucky if it stays clean for a day these days – I blame my 6 year old boy for that. ¬†And why, does my husband have to shave right after I clean and polish the whole bathroom?! ¬†The water splats on the mirror drives me crazy! ¬†Do you really need to splatter food particles on the mirror when you floss? ¬†My 3 year old keeps going through my drawers and misplacing things…when I find things where they are not supposed to be, it has her name written all over it. ¬†When I go to put new laundered clothes in drawers, I find t-shirts in a ball, (obviously, it was tried on, but he chose not to wear it) but why, can’t he fold it back?! ¬†Oh C’mon, why can’t you just put the deodorant back to it’s slot?! ¬† Is this dirty or clean? ¬†Why is this on the floor? ¬†The toilet paper flap must be draping from the top. ¬†Sometimes, I get so discouraged. ¬†Sometimes, I jam the shirts back in the drawer, in a ball. ¬†I walk away, but I can’t – I have to go back, re-organize the whole drawer. ¬†Ugh…so pathetic.

I try to be more casual about these things. ¬†But it’s not a bad thing, I think. ¬†I want my kids to be tidy, organized. ¬†It’s better to be tidy than sloppy, for sure. ¬†My son is picking up on my habits a little, he knows every toy has to be where it’s supposed to be, and will correct me if I put a Spiderman in a Batman box. ¬†He tells his friends to take off their shoes when they come in the house. ¬†Yes, it’s working ūüôā ¬†Now, if I can just get my daughter to be a little neater, it will make my life so much easier!

Happy Birthday Mia!

13 Sep

Dear Mia, my baby girl!

Happy Birthday to my precious little girl!  You are 4 years old today!

I can’t imagine you have been with me for only 4 years. ¬†Daddy and I was just talking about that last night, and we feel like you have been with us all our lives, because you were always in our hearts. ¬†We just knew we will have a little Mia some day.

When I had you in my belly, you moved alot!  I had a great pregnancy.  I ate alot of ageedashi-tofu.  I had some mood swings (I guess girl hormones makes you moody?)  But overall, it was wonderful having you in my belly!  I loved every moment of it.

The delivery was one of the best experiences I’ve ever had. ¬†The ladies at Miami Maternity Center was wonderful. ¬†I went to the mall with nana and Noa on the due date (12th), because it felt like any other day. ¬†The morning of the 13th, I woke up with a contraction. ¬†I counted the minutes in between. ¬†When the minutes were exactly 8 minutes apart, I knew it was time. ¬†We went to the maternity center around 11am, and by then, the contractions were so powerful. ¬†I was about 5 cm¬†dilated. ¬†Daddy went to get food from Panera, which I tried to eat, but I just couldn’t with my contractions. ¬†By 2pm, we were in our purple room (now I know why it’s one of your favorite colors!), in the¬†Jacuzzi. ¬†The warm water was a relief for the pain, but it was really an intense pain like nothing else. ¬†I dozed off right after each contractions (from the natural¬†endorphin) while daddy caressed my back. ¬†I was finally 10cm dilated. ¬†We moved onto the bed, daddy pulled you out,¬†and you were in my arms! ¬†It was 4:23pm. ¬†You were 6lbs 12 oz. ¬†and 19 1/4 long. ¬†The recovery was fast. ¬†You met Noa, nana, your cousins, and tia. ¬†We were home 3 hrs later. ¬†Daddy even picked up Reirei and Risa at the airport by the end of the night! ¬†It was a great day!

Today, you are a little ball of energy. ¬†You are a firecracker! ¬†You are fearless, and always have me on edge. ¬†You want to do everything. ¬†You can be an angel, or a little devil. ¬†You can be so lovable and caring one minute, and drive me crazy the other. ¬†You can be such a young lady, or a baby. ¬†You can be so independent, or so¬†dependent. ¬†Maybe because we have never separated since your birth, and maybe because I nursed you until you were 3, whatever the reason, you are very very attached to me – which I cherish! ¬†When I’m having a bad day, you always cheer me up, with your smiles, your “I love you mamma”s and your sweet hugs and kisses. ¬†You make me so happy from the core.

I’m so excited to watch you grow. ¬†Thank you for being in my life. ¬†I love you so so much!

Love,

Mamma

Junk TV

4 Sep

TV, TV, TV…

I love it and despise it. ¬†Before I had kids, my husband and I used to be a TV junkie – we watched all kinds of shows. ¬†We had weekly show line ups, and this was before “On Demand” was available to us, so we watched it when it was aired, commercials and everything. ¬†Bottom line was, we had TIME. ¬†Today, 24hrs is just not enough time in a day. ¬†Really, how does a week pass by so fast? – is what we say every week. ¬†Today, we really don’t have time or the allowance to watch the shows we would like to watch. ¬†The kids channels are completely dominating the tv in our house. ¬†My husband and I still do watch our favorite (rated M) shows – always “On Demand” – late at night after the kids are asleep. ¬†The sad thing is that we rarely make it through a movie without falling asleep… ¬†I despise TV because it makes me feel guilty – right after the pleasure it has given me by the entertainment, I start feeling the sense of guilt that I have wasted time away – but I do go back to it every week. ¬†It’s a vicious cycle. ¬†It’s like unhealthy food. ¬†You know it’s bad, but you just have to have french fries once in a while.

Anyhow, there are shows we all watch together as a family, that we can all enjoy, like the singing competition shows, Food and Travel shows, etc. ¬†(I had to put a stop to Family Guy and American Dad, they were my kids’ and our favorite shows, but it’s bad when your 3 year old daughter starts picking up that sense of humor.) ¬†The most recent show we enjoyed is “Here Comes Honey Boo Boo.” ¬†It’s on TLC, which has the most “wrong” line up of shows – but I can’t help watching them, because they are so entertaining. ¬†Many of the shows on TLC is, I think, exploitation. ¬†You know when you see people that you want to stare at, but it’s rude to do so? ¬†Well, these shows allows the public to freely watch, without feeling bad about it. ¬†The shows showcase “unique” and “extraordinary” people and situations, in an entertaining way, and I can’t help tuning in. ¬†The curiosity is what drives me to tune in. ¬†I mean, if you saw this on your tv guide – “My teen is pregnant, and so am I” – wouldn’t you be curious? ¬†I love the “hoarding” shows. ¬†I don’t care for “what not to wear” – who cares? ¬†Back to Honey Boo Boo… you have got to watch it. ¬†I have not laughed like that in a while. ¬†This family is hilarious! ¬†I don’t know where they live, but they have train track running behind their back yard! ¬†The whole family is something out of a movie. ¬†We need subtitles to understand what they are saying (and they are speaking English)! ¬†I’m so entertained! ¬†(Is that bad?) ¬†Honey Boo Boo, the “Star” of the show, is just lovable. ¬†She is so sassy, I can’t believe she is my son’s age. ¬†She won my husband’s heart over when she did her “Elvis’ thing. ¬†I would never watch “Toddlers and Tiaras”, but I’ve scheduled a recording for Honey Boo Boo. ¬†Really, she has so much character, she deserves a show.